Still, Garthwaite needs to do something with his time, I guess, so I will go out on a limb and say this is as fine an idea as Phil Garthwaite has ever had.
Indeed, as meaningless as Garthwaite's resolution banning "swine flu" is, it is one of the only things he has done with his last 10 months in office. So far, he has introduced only a small handful of bills and has not yet been able to get a single piece of legislation passed through the legislature. Perhaps more importantly he has been unarguably ineffective as the chairman of the Assembly Committee on Rural Economic Development.
The committee Garthwaite chairs is tasked with helping to bring jobs to rural Wisconsin - places like Grant County. Ask anyone in his district and they will tell you that the struggling economy and high unemployment are a huge concerns. Despite this, Garthwaite has not held a single hearing on legislation yet this year. Sure he had a brief informational hearing last winter but that is it. Garthwaite has tremendous power and influence that he could use to ease unemployment in Grant County and what is he doing with it? Nothing. Nada. Zilch. He has spent more time sitting on his bar stool at Kuepers Tavern in Dickeyville then he has in his chairman's seat in Madison. Rural Wisconsin suffers for it.
Last month, the Assembly Minority Leader Jeff Fitzgerald commented on Garthwaite's lack of work in Madison stating:
Wisconsin is suffering through record unemployment yet Rep. Garthwaite has refused to hold a public hearing in a committee tasked with bringing jobs to rural Wisconsin. The people of Wisconsin deserve more from their elected officials than a committee chairman who refuses to do his job. At a time when he should be focusing on bringing jobs to rural Wisconsin he has instead prioritized bills renaming the Swine Flu and creating a committee to study the industrial uses of marijuana.
Now Nichols is weighing in. If you haven't read the column yet, please click here and read it. It is both true and funny. Here's my favorite part:
I asked him (Garthwaite) if maybe, using his logic, there isn't also a problem with use of the term "chicken pox."
"Chicken pox, No. 1, has been engrained in people's heads since Christ was a corporal and, No. 2, does the price of chicken go down when junior gets the chicken pox?" asked Garthwaite.
I suppose not, but I have another question. What the heck does that phrase mean exactly anyway, "since Christ was a corporal"?
I say we all pass a resolution ordering Phil Garthwaite to just say, "a long time."
As someone who has long been perplexed by Garthwaite's colloquialisms from "I didn't just ride in here on a head of cabbage," to "I'll bet you beans to bacon," I appreciated Nichols poking fun. Perhaps if Rep. Garthwaite spent as much time working as he did thinking up these weird expressions, he could actually accomplish something.
